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French
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French
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La vie est inutile Il n'y a absolument rien à vivre surtout pour les gens inutiles comme moi qui ne font rien d'autre que la sangsue des autres, je dois juste finir le travail et tout sera réparé après tout un cadavre ne peut plus ressentir de regret ou de tristesse Ce qui est là pour moi à perdre plus Outre plus d'années de souffrance et de douleur
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Mon corps est en train de s'effondrer Je suis mentalement et physiquement épuisé Je suis fatigué de me réveiller tous les jours dans la douleur Je suis fatigué d'être seul Je suis fatigué de haïr les gens autour de moi, mais étant le ridicule amusant de cacher comment je me sens à l'intérieur Je suis fatigué d'appeler malade du travail pour m'asseoir sur mon canapé et de penser à la meilleure façon de laisser aller Je suis juste fatigué
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And life will never get better and I deserve to die hi I'm sorry if these break the rules I'm trying not to i m i m also trans yeah I know and have been abused my whole life my family never set me up for anything no college fund never learned to drive was pulled out of school after second grade no i wasn't homeschooled I have no job no money I'm also an artist but my art is shit awful even tho I'm and have been at this over years I can't find a job no matter what I do because my resume is bad I can't go to therapy or get meds or hormones or even buy decent food because I have no money I want to die people keep telling me it'll get better but it doesn't i m I feel like by this point in your life the trajectory of your life is pretty much set in stone i ve seen so many older people in their s and s and older who NEVER got their lives together were always dirt poor and unhappy and mentally unwell I don't want that to be me i ve also missed out on living most of my life as a man I'm i should've been transitioned years ago what's even the point now I have hope every time I try to make my life better it gets worse and worse and worse and nobody can save me or help me i self harm and get incredibly angry at myself over anything today it was because my roommate was doing the dishes I should ve been doing them or done them already I'm a lazy piece of shit who should just die already I deserve to die because I deserve to be punished just like with the self harm I think about suicide dying and punishment a lot almost every day especially when I get like this mad at myself I have very colorful language and ideas thrown at myself I talk about myself very violently and badly I deserve to be punished for messing up and being in general a waste of space and a useless idiot that's it I guess I want to die and know my life won't get better ever and there's no fixing it and I need money but I am never getting money so I can't get help
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La meilleure option a perdu l'amour de ma vie à un autre homme Je pense qu'ils vont se marier Je veux juste mourir
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Fatigué de penser que je serai quelque chose d'inaccessible dans mes dernières années plus chauve qu'un Sasquatch et pourtant je suis trans ouais je pense que je prendrai la voie facile plus tard et tous
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Je jure de baiser que quelque chose veut ma mort Legit j'ai été extrêmement en retard à mes devoirs en particulier une évaluation de maths due demain j'ouvre mon devoir pour le terminer et boom le document de mot est foutu je jure de baiser que la vie caresse mon sac de balle il veut que je légitime mourir ou quelque chose que cela ajouté en plus de tous mes autres problèmes d'école est la cerise sur le gâteau
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If you read this I can't keep doing this much longer I almost killed myself on your birthday
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I'm diseased and in pain I've been wanting to kill myself I'm alone diseased and in constant pain I injured my teeth, so I have constant tooth pain I recently had disturbing HPV symptoms and now I'm taking medicine that burns my skin for weeks I'm paranoid I have oral cancer and that partly explains my tooth pain I've had panic attacks and wish all my pain and health problems could be resolved sometimes my teeth hurt so much I fantasize about having them all pulled but I've never had a cavity, and they are beautiful teeth I can't get out of bed Help
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Je vais probablement le faire éventuellement savoir que je suis faible que ma situation n'est pas si mauvaise Mais je pense constamment à y mettre fin pourquoi je devrais le faire combien il serait plus facile Il ne serait pas difficile car il serait facile que je vis sur le sol Je pourrais juste sauter au milieu de la nuit pendant que tout le monde est endormi Je n'ai personne à qui parler de la façon dont je me sens aujourd'hui, mais il n'y a toujours pas de raison pour laquelle je ne veux pas
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don't know what to do everyday feels more melancholic than the last so much free time to just sit here and contemplate I don't know how much more i ll be able to handle I can't just get up and end my life I know it'll destroy the one person who cares about me my mother I just don't know what to do anymore i m stuck
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Je ne sais pas quoi faire plus m vraiment perdu ici Je suis un père d'un an avec des enfants que je suis marié, mais je ne suis pas sûr pour combien de temps Ce soir était le point de rupture Je ne sais même pas ce qui s'est passé Ma femme a découvert que j'ai suivi un cosplay Je suis toujours honnête modèles obscènes sur Instagram et paniqué sur moi, Elle a explosé tout ce que j'avais à portée de main
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Putain que nous sommes obligés d'exister pas dire si vous voulez être né de toute façon je vais aller faire d s et j'espère mourir
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Je ne sais pas vraiment si cela va aider Rien ne semble que j'ai été aux prises avec ma santé mentale depuis le lycée, et il semble que ça ne fait qu'empirer, même dix ans plus tard, je prends mes médicaments, je fais de la thérapie et j'essaie tellement de faire des pas pour améliorer ma vie, mais juste quand j'ai l'impression que j'ai fait du chemin dans certains domaines, je ne me sens pas.
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I'll probably be dead in a few days really don't know what I'm doing any more I'm lost and tired I'm ready for it to end I'm working on a note and I might have something I can tie a noose with, but I might pussy out again who knows and who really cares it might hurt people but I'll be forgotten in the end
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I don't know what to do any more My livelihood seems to be at a standstill and I'm really debating just ending it I was having a good time hunting in my video games and slaughtering all the evil grainers The servers have gone down in red dead online and I just don't know what to do I've been sat in my room for the past hours doing nothing clicking refresh constantly and it's just not working
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Essayer de me tuer figure si je le fais assez vite je n'aurai pas le temps d'y réfléchir, je n'ai pas une corde cependant donc c'est difficile et continue à tomber en morceaux, ou ça devient trop douloureux je ne veux tout simplement plus souffrir
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I don't know what I am doing anymore don't know what I'm doing with my life any more I am losing the ability to focus on anything or work on anything my grades are dropping i m being teased taunted and bullied every day and no one cares I have two friends one of which I am drifting farther and farther away from and I'm scare dim gonna lone one of the few friends I have ever had I am constantly worrying about my school work or how i m going to try to avoid the people who are bullying harassing me its gotten to the point where It's almost hard to remember a time when I was happy and not just pretending to be happy so people don't get worried about me there has been so much shit thrown at me that i don't know how much longer I can keep pretending to be happy and I'm scared that when somebody places the straw that breaks the camel's back i won't be able to take it and the kid who is release bullying me is going to go home in a cast and ill end up killing myself the only reason this has not happened already is that i don't want to hurt the two last friends I have but I fear it will get to a point that that won't matter if you were are in a similar situation pleas leave some advice on how to get through these thanks, thanks for reading sorry for my grammar and spelling i m a slightly dyslexic and dystrophic the grader who can't spell for shit
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I'm being tortured People are calling my name but I'm all alone, and I don't know where they are but they re going to kill and I'm going to die
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Assez de cette apaiser de merde en avait assez J'en ai marre de la merde des gens et j'ai été privé de l'assurance maladie des pauvres parce que je n'ai pas de personnes à charge un an trop tard parce qu'ils l'ont coupé du budget Je ne vais pas les laisser tomber Je vais les aider Je vais leur dire que c'est un grand budget
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I feel so lonely feel so alone I have no friends or anyone to talk to My parents work a lot and I only see them on weekends At school no one talks to me and I feel like outcast Being alone feels terrible and sometimes I feel like ending it I have no idea where my life is going
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Tight L I am definitely not suicidal But I am homicidal my life has gone to s and I feel that the entire system that supports me has betrayed me is there anybody out there that can help me get back to reason
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I don't think I'll make it through this year Honestly I don't know how I'll make it another year let alone month Everything sucks and this year got off to a horrible start Last year and before was so rough I don't even know how I'm going to make it through this year unless things magically get better which they won't I don't know I just feel like this is my time
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Aujourd'hui c'est mon anniversaire J'ai acheté une corde pour ce soir Yep J'ai acheté mon propre cadeau d'anniversaire Mon dernier anniversaire Je ne pensais même pas que je le ferais, mais me voici et me voilà Merci d'avoir lu mes derniers mots Au revoir
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My girlfriend broke up with me M and i m thinking about suicide please help me i m French sorry for bad English I don't know if it's the correct Subreddit but i m desperate Ok so I know i m young and a lot of you are going to say it's only a breakup it happens all the time with young people etc. But she broke with me yesterday and I can't get over it I'm alone and I need to talk I feel like I'm going crazy and can't stop crying it hurts so much I'm not searching for attention or pity I need advices and people to talk Context It was a two years relationship I met her in class preparatives really hard studying years and after a few complicated relationships which destroyed my self-confidence she was the really first girl for whom I fell in love But this year we went in different schools KMS parts after ours finals exams from last year And so we travelled every week to see each others but the last months I felt something was wrong The insecurities came back and I took a week to see her so we can face the problem But when I started the conversation it went way too farther than I expected We didn't insult each other or yelling she just admitted sh s not in love with me anymore and that she has no feelings now She don't want to make efforts every day to continue and said to me that I did nothing just she changed But I never ceased to love her and tried to make her happy and now I feel so much pain She told me the bast thing for her was that I go away maybe for a month or forever she doesn't now So I respected her and left because I want her to be happy but now i m at the airport and can't stop crying and really I feel i m worthless She admitted I did nothing wrong and i don't understand some girls are still in love with guys that mistreat them and I just loved her the best I could I'm going crazy and really considering to end my miserable life TL;DR My GF said she doesn't love me anymore for no real reason and i m thinking about suicide help me please Thank you for reading all
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Ne pas faire mieux ou pire, j'ai essayé En raison d'une tentative stupide bc les gommes ne sont pas assez forts à moins que je vers le bas tout ce que j'ai décidé avec laisser mon Anorexie faire le travail pour moi, et il finira par Alors merci Reddit j'apprécie tous les mots gentils je ne suis pas encore proche mais bientôt je serai incapable de soutenir la vie Pas encore au revoir LG
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Violent dry heaving anxiety and chronic depression I don't want to be here any more I don't have anyone to talk to I'm alone and no one understands me I'm constantly misunderstood, and I don't know who I am I'm constantly dry heaving, and I held in vomit last light as I sat on the restroom crying When do I get to be happy When do I get to be the one that has a smile on her face People constantly tell me I look angry it s because I am I'm angry at the life I was given, and I want it gone banished I have no one Constant dry heaving is making me insane relationship problems me being constantly misunderstood me constantly being told I'm doing something wrong wrong wrong by EVERYONE I never mean any harm, but I somehow always cause it I don't want to be here anymore No one can help me it's too late It helps to write out my thoughts for people to read makes me feel a little less alone when I know I will always continue to be alone People like me don't need to be on Earth people like me should have never been born I'll be leaving soon
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Don't Haven't left house Alone PC is Shit Don't know how much longer I can go Losing my mind I've been really riddled with anxiety depression agoraphobia since I was a freshman in high school I am now in July I've only left my house times in years All I do is sit in my room alone for hours a day Eat my one meal I get per day And play on the computer alone My computer is straight dog shit and even that is starting to drive me insane I feel myself literally losing my mind I don't want help any more I've grown too comfortable in my misery I'm trapped
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Ever have a lot of good things going for you and yet you still want to die TL;DR I have a lot of good things going but I still think about suicide and SH Hubby and I planned to see my psychiatrist about it only to end up not going for various reasons I worry that these thoughts won't get better despite being medicated and that I'm playing with my health and I don't feel my hubby understands the seriousness I'm married I have a new job lined up for me next week I have supportive friends and a loving mother-in-law I have a sweet dog and cat We live in a nice place Then why do I still want to die Why do I continue to obsess over it when I'm aware of what all I have to lose I have stressors and situations that I feel trapped in but I m told things will get better but when I've had increased thoughts of suicide and SH lately to the point where my husband wanted to take me to the hospital We argued back and forth about it and decided to make an emergency appointment with my psychiatrist and develop a safety plan that involved me not being alone Night before the appointment I bring up the possibility of the doctor recommending me to hospitalization due to the suicidal thoughts and research I've done in the past few months the suicide video I've made on my phone for my family and friends and the overwhelming number of fresh and old SH marks on my arms and thighs I feel that my husband s opinion on going the next morning suddenly changed he was miserable the last time I was hospitalized and wanted to look at alternatives I named a few but reminded him that I could be dropped as a patient for cancelling after hours and if I wasn't dropped my next appointment wouldn't be till April We talked about calling his nurse to see if any medication changes could be done to help until then and my husband encouraged me to find alternatives Don't get me wrong I don't want to go to the hospital either but I'm afraid if things get really bad that I'll do something without thinking or when I'm drunk Even accidentally SH in a way that could be seen as suicidal scares me Day of the appointment I go back and forth based on what my husband and I talked about the night before and initially decided not to go based on his concerns I later changed my mind feeling like I was taking a gamble with my life by not going and started getting ready I felt that my husband started dragging his feet on getting ready to leave Eventually I got frustrated and decided not to go because we would be too late I don't fully blame him if I had gotten ready earlier and decided initially to go I would be there now Part of me wants to die but part of me doesn't I don't know how to fix it on my own and feel pressured to find an appropriate solution and I don't know how without talking to my doctors about my options even if it s hospitalization for active SH and suicidal thoughts Not sure where to go from here My aunt was the same way before she ultimately committed suicide I was at the time and I don't want to follow in her footsteps
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La pluie sur un bateau blanc Récemment, un rêve m'a trouvé gouttes de pluie jetés vers le bas du vaste ciel bleu des milliers de diamants tombant en abondance Le plancher du pont était saturé d'humidité Je me suis saisi vigoureusement sur les mains courantes en regardant mes pas comme je traversais à l'autre extrémité une destination qui est resté invisible fantômes du passé est resté comme un éclair de lumière La femme que je souhaitais était ma mère J'ai pesé
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Inner Vision par Sunil Ran Cela m'a frappé comme une analyse assez puissante du suicide et pourquoi pas, même si c'est un jeu Flash plutôt simpliste.
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Rest would be nice I don't sleep I live in a one room bedsit My mother hates me, so I can't live with her My stepmother seems annoyed by my very existence which caught me off guard as she's usually pretty affectionate so I can't live with my dad I can't drive hand few marketable skills and the ones I do have are for things that are difficult as hell to get into so what chance does a luckless twit like me have at any success I've attempted suicide twice since September and I've lost friends because of it I have no prospects and no hope not that hope has ever done me any good before That probably sounds self-pitying, but I don't really care It's not even that I necessarily want to die I just want some peace for a while sleep would be peaceful if I could manage it
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I can't keep at it any more I just can't It's not that I don't want to think of my family It s because I m in a lot of pain And it doesn't fucking get better No one can know that And personally it hasn't I see my bullies going off to medical school while I'm nothing is fair or right And quite frankly there's no point trying to solve my deluge of problems
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Eh je ne sais pas pourquoi je poste ici depuis que mon connard ne veut même pas entrer en ce moment, mais je suis juste tendre la main parce que j'ai besoin de quelqu'un à qui parler, je n'ai jamais été si près d'abandonner avant et je me fais peur et j'ai littéralement personne à qui parler de cela alors ouais juste besoin d'un ami maintenant
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JUST do this don't think Don t think too much about this JUST do it Find a quiet place where you'll not get disturbed You can sit or lay down for this Close your eyes Imagine a small river that flows On that river there are some leaves Now put every and I mean every thought you have on a leave and let it flow down the river Don't make the river go faster of slower Just observe as the thought flows on the river If you get distracted by a thought it's okay just come back to the river again and put that thought on a leave and let it flow Do this for at least mins
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Am I crazy feel like I'm going crazy My trigger for my suicidal thoughts seems to be outlandish, and I don't know how to explain it A while ago I had planned my death to the day Once all said and done I went to the railroad My choice of death would be by train Once I got there I waited for a while for the next train to come by The train came rolling through likes it always had I was ready I was ft away but I froze I went home and cried my eyes out before going up sleep Now whenever I hear a train whistle I instantly get nervous and feel worthless because I was too weak to take my life Nobody I know would accept that They would call me childish I just feel like I'm crazy No one I know can ever know They just wouldn't understand
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Misery loves company Probably why I browse this sub whenever my depression becomes so unbearable
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Je n'aime pas me sentir comme ça J'ai été déprimé pendant des années Il vient et s'en va Certains jours sont meilleurs que d'autres J'ai un excellent je suis un SO qui est mon seul point d'ancrage dans ce monde Je n'ai pas de religion ou je ne veux pas Je n'ai pas d'enfants ni de famille Je ne suis pas proche ni ne me soucie pas d'être heureux Je suis heureux
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Kinda just need someone to talk to little over a year ago I divorced someone who was severely abusive Something has happened that lead to me reliving a lot of it The result has me contemplating suicide with pretty strong intent if I'm being honest Not a lot of people know what I went through I really just need someone to talk to about it even if it's just them listening to my story My ex-husband is a statutory rapist and child molester I didn't know that when I married him He told me after we had taken a trip to another state to see my parents He point-blank told me he didn't tell me before the trip because if I knew I could have left him and stayed with my parents He told me an hour into an hour drive home I demanded he turn the car around and take me back, and he refused I was disabled and unable to drive, and he had driven away all of my friends, so I was helpless to leave him once we got back and had no one to help me get away I remember how utterly helpless and hopeless I felt on that drive home I am not small at ft tall but at the time I was severely underweight at lbs and had absolutely no power to ever do anything he didn't want me to do because he weighed close to lbs At more than double my size there was nothing he wanted me to do that I could refuse This included sex which he would demand as his biblical right even when I was having PTSD flashbacks to a rape I experienced I never told him how much his size intimidated me and I never realized that I likely put on a lot of weight got up to as a defense mechanism to feel less powerless against him, He tried to kill me I've struggled with severe depression my entire life, and he would intentionally make it worse He would do things to trigger a meltdown when I was suicidal in an attempt to get me to kill myself He would go on spending sprees at the end of the month so that we would struggle to pay rent to trigger me he would tell me things to scare me like that a past abuser who hadn't had discovered where we live and could come by at any time he would manipulate me into acting on my suicidal urges by forgetting to lock away the weapons only when I was suicidal depressed and kept sleeping through me ugly sobbing not quietly as I used whatever sharp objects I could find to try and kill myself multiple times when he found me unconscious in the bathtub with my wrists slit he didn't call the cops I woke up I don't know how much longer to lying in a now drained bathtub with him on his phone next to me as if he was just passing the time until I died A lot of this I have never told anyone and I don't really have anyone IRL that I could, I just needed to get it out I'm about to go to bed but please someone talk to me for when I wake up in the morning I will respond then, and I desperately need someone to talk to about this even if it's just to realize someone else out there knows my story and what I've been through
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Why does this Subreddit have the upvote downvote system I find it quite strange it s as if some people s thoughts on the matter are more important than those of others It also implies that some suicidal people are more important than others that some people s sufferings are more important Am I right If not then why is it here Doing this place really need it
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Je ne pouvais pas résister à l'anxiété Appelé HR d'une autre entreprise que je voulais vraiment travailler pour mais ils ne m'auraient pas parce que je suis en cours d'études extra-muros Je suis désolée Si je suis désolée Si je suis désolée Je suis désolée Si je suis désolée Je suis désolée Si je suis désolée Si je suis désolée, je ne peux pas payer ce mois-ci, donc j'ai dû annuler mes études
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I don't know whether to kill myself tonight or not tried once before as a cry for help and once before seriously Mental health services have a a constant cycle of referrals nothing has been done since I first requested help a year ago My family are on holiday friend is at uni and there is another friend staying at my flat tonight so I can give her a hug goodbye and not really be alone while it happens I think I m going to get really drunk and take pills again and cut my wrist and it'll hopefully make me pass out again I m in the process of deleting my Facebook and bank details and stuff now but I'm still mulling it over Should I I can't get the help I need It's hopeless K don't know what to do but this
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I need help need to find a job that I can do from home quickly I'm close to ending it I hate this job I hate people
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Comment les gens ne pensent pas au suicide Je pense juste que c'est l'option la plus logique à faire quand la vie est beaucoup de travail et de douleur et qu'il y a un sens à cela
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I don't think I'll ever be content seriously considering suicide Can someone talk with me, I'm a yr old female Asian with huge expectations for myself The thing is I can never fulfill them I want to go to Harvard or Princeton and I'm really smart But I'm not smart enough I have mistakes You can call it being human but I see it as factory errors I feel like it was predestined someone made me like this It feels like I'm pushing against an iron wall and trying with everything I have to change it The reality is that it's not going to move no matter how hard I hope and pray It was predestined I was already chosen to fail Nothing is going to change that I can't leave and forget about it, I want it so much I want to have that letter in my hands telling me congratulations I've been dreaming of it for four years I can't imagine life without it, I'm just as stubborn as that iron wall and my mind demands that it happens or my existence would just vanish I haven't planned what would happen if I didn't get in so my brain automatically computes that as null There's no answer no life So I should die Even if I did get in I'll eventually have to face failure someday Whether it's a test score or job interviews I'll see it again I'm so scared of failing I don't want to think about it, I don't want it there I wouldn't be able to handle it is s so horrible I'd rather die than face it I want to die right now and save myself all the pain Please help me Someone talk some sense into me
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La plupart d'entre vous ne me connaissent pas, mais j'ai toujours l'impression que je devrais dire au revoir, je vais sauter d'un parking de pieds de haut, je ne peux plus le faire, je souffre trop, je n'ai pas mangé depuis des jours ou dormi depuis des jours, je mange mon dernier repas en ce moment.
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Mon oncle s'est tué hier soir, je ne sais pas quoi faire ni où me tourner, je suis impuissant et je ne veux pas être ici dans ce monde, j'ai besoin d'aide
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Je me sens piégé, je veux mourir, mais je ne veux pas quitter ma famille avec des arrangements de mort coûteux ou avoir une pauvre âme trouver mon corps, je suis poubelle totale, je n'ai plus d'amis, je les ai tous gâchés, j'ai été remplacé, l'amour de ma vie ne veut plus de moi, je ne suis aucune compétence, aucune intelligence, aucun talent, pas même une personnalité rédemptrice, je me sens comme la meilleure chose que je puisse faire.
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I am suicidal Yeah I am
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Slashes on my wrist will make it I'm just sixteen and i m afraid to tell my mom what I'm going through Scared that she might see the cuts on my left wrist I always try to hide it from her whenever she's around Pain is everything family If u cannot handle the aches find a way to ease it
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Après un long temps de cul, je l'ai fait, je me coupe, ça fait si mal et j'avais juste besoin de ressentir quelque chose que je veux être heureux, mais cela ne fonctionne jamais, la douleur fait si mal qu'elle ne disparaît jamais, peu importe ce que je fais
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Je suis devenu de plus en plus suicidaire ces dernières semaines Mon esprit ne peut littéralement pas arrêter de ruminer Je ne peux rien faire d'un seul jour quand j'ai eu une pause Je suis tellement épuisé mentalement Je ne veux vraiment plus m'occuper de cet esprit J'ai essayé de me pendre plusieurs fois contre mon lit juste pour sentir ce que c'est que de perdre conscience
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Je ne veux pas vraiment mourir encore, mais je pense vraiment à prendre les pilules ce soir, mais je ne veux pas vraiment mourir, mais je veux juste prendre toutes les pilules et aller dans le coma pendant quelques jours, je ne sais pas, je veux vraiment le faire, mais la mort est effrayant, ce que je pense vraiment, c'est de l'aide, mais toutes mes tentatives pour y arriver, j'ai échoué, donc en dernier recours, je suis hospitalisé pour une tentative de suicide.
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Death is getting closer and closer every day Hi I've been depressed for several years and I'm finally ready to actually kill myself instead of failing with multiple suicide attempts I have a knife and drugs ready All there is to do is leave the house find a dark quiet place and Stab myself to death and swallow multiple drugs I keep thinking about my clothes being soaked in my own blood and covered in blood A dark quiet place, so nobody can find my body amp x B No one cares about me anyway This is my only choice left which is Death I already scheduled all my notes on Social media Goodbye everyone amp x B Hopefully I bleed to death
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J'ai besoin d'aide pour aider mon frère cadet F M a dit à ma mère aujourd'hui qu'il était déprimé et suicidaire aujourd'hui Elle m'a appelé, et nous l'avons emmené aux urgences où ils l'ont évalué et ont décidé de le garder toute la nuit Nous le soutenons et l'aidons Ma mère a dû appeler d'une réunion de travail importante et ses amis de travail sont concernés Est-ce que quelqu'un sait comment expliquer cette urgence familiale
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Je tremble pense qu'il est temps pour moi d'y aller, je suis déçu de mes amis, ma famille et mes collègues, j'ai essayé de rendre ma vie meilleure, je l'ai vraiment fait, mais comme elle est dans mon esprit, je ne peux rien faire, je ne pense pas que quelqu'un ait réalisé à quel point j'ai été triste, mais ils vont avec.
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I love my life but every night I cry in my room thinking about suicide This has been happening way too often recently again and I am currently just crying in my bedroom I love my life but I can't stand my mom She is the only reason I get no sleep ever she is the reason I trade out pillows at night because mines already wet I can't do anything right in her eyes And what makes it all worst is that she doesn't even know how suicidal I am She constantly bombards me with shameful comments and I act like I don't care because if I do she'll use them against me, She loves and I love her but she thinks she's helping my family turn into better people when she's really destroying it Again I love my life Within the past week I've just been noticing how much joy I have doing what I do This is when I've realized that everything that makes me so depressed with life is her She comes home late with my sisters everyday late at night so I get her bull crap always at the end of the day This is why every night I think about writing my last words and just grabbing a knife When I try to stand up against my moms stupid ass comments so tries to play as the victim and says she feels attacked and one of these days she's going to kill herself I know she won't Sorry that this post doesn't make much sense it was just whatever came to my mind at the moment This post while writing however did make me feel a lot better I'm not going to kill my self because I know it'll hurt and that makes me oddly feel better too Please no one of you see this comment Writing is for some reason making me feel nice even if it is all jumbled up
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French
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Devrais-je y mettre fin Fondamentalement, je n'ai jamais été bon à rien d'autre que l'école en préparation Personne ne m'aime tout le monde me traite comme le POS je suis je n'ai aucune compétence sociale je ne peux pas jouer footy pour la vie de moi j'ai passé s diabétiques d'heures dans les jeux vidéo luttant pour obtenir tuer dans le rang d'or sur l'arc-en ciel s et la dernière chose qui me vient à l'esprit
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I don't know where to GOI ve been homeless for Going on nights in Seattle I don't know where to go I have no friends or family here I'm stranded walking in the city and looking at all the people I just want to be gone I am lost here, and I just want the pain to end I know I am not being smart about this but I don't know where to go any more I feel so lost physically, and mentally I feel detached from everyone I feel like this is my last day on this planet Time just goes so slow when you have nowhere to go Then the night comes, and I am afraid to close my eyes Is it even worth trying to get back up
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I'm not sure how much more disappointment I can take I've been unemployed for just over six months, and I am on my last week of benefits I was fired from an abusive confusing and stressful job that I ultimately hated despite always putting in serious effort and insane hours Since then it has been difficult to find a job at my level or even below my level due to my lack of a bachelor s degree and the fact that I was terminated from my previous position My good name was tarnished at my previous job by one of my subordinates who manipulated several situations with my bosses to get me fired and gaslighted me the entire time we worked together That person then took my position at the company That person has since been fired for trying to do the same thing with other employees but the damage has been done to me A car that I am financing and paying a high amount for insurance is unreliable and has some sort of electrical issue I can't afford to even have evaluated let alone fixed My other vehicle is so old and rare that parts can't even be found for it anymore so I'm just waiting for the day that it decides to call it quits on me, I've been applying for lower level receptionist positions in the same field but still getting picked over Mind you I've hired people for these kinds of positions in this small town and that's the most insulting part I know the types of people that apply for these positions most of them can't spell I guess you could say that I feel like I'm better than this and mostly better than the competition I know that sounds elitist entitled and unprofessional I have never said anything like this out loud and would never admit to it outside a throwaway account It's toxic and it's not how I present myself ever That's just what the last few months have done to me My spouse is older than me and I went into this marriage several years ago with full knowledge of his health conditions Unfortunately things have taken several negative turns in the last few months and I'm currently trying to get him an appointment in the city since there is no one here to adequately treat him That's about me round trip which means gas I have to pay for and excessive wear on my vehicle I very recently started applying for part-time work at hotels front desk custodial etc. and can't get an interview until the beginning of next month by which time I'll be broke My dad is pretty useless and ruined my mom s credit when I was a child So building protecting my credit has been paramount I've still never missed any payments but my score has dropped into the s since I have only been making minimum payments and allowed some balances to grow My overall debt isn't that bad but it is suffocating me right now, and I can't fathom going delinquent on anything I have two cards that I'm late on already and I'm not sure how I m going to handle that I don't want to be a loser It seems really silly for me to care so much about my debt but I've spent my life always doing the right thing Everything just seems so unfair to me right now and if that isn't bad enough my cynical entitled thoughts are making it worse I can start off in a good mood but even the most minor of inconveniences and disappointments can send me into a downward spiral of hopelessness I don't want to die I guess I just want to stop existing
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French
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Je me sens comme une énergie gaspillée Je me sens de moins en moins comme un humain et plus comme un organisme qui vit juste Mes pensées sont de plus en plus sur la fin de ma vie, donc je peux redonner mon énergie à la Terre
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I'm really not ok I've lurked hear a lot of seeing peoples stories on my main I never thought I'd be at this point I love my daughter and she's the only thing really keeping me here but it's coming to a point where even that's not enough and I'm not ok It sucks because this is really all over her Mom and I feel like such an idiot for letting it get here but Here I am My daughters in my arms now but I've never felt more empty inside I don't know how long I can continue with this
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Decide dim too much of a pussy to kill myself I can't even leave my flat I've been trying to force myself to go out for hours I'm at the point I'm even sad for being banned from every discussion in attempt to have at least some sort of communication Can't look my GF into eyes can't force myself to even talk I don't know what I feel I'm failure Complete human wreck
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Dying of loneliness am a year-old guy from the USA and I feel like no one notices me I am sure that no one at college cares about me either plus I have never had a real friend since elementary school The loneliness has been crushing I can't even get a job either I tried hundreds of applications and job fairs, but none of the employers ever got back to me, I tried to kill myself years ago through overdose But it didn't work But the overdose did cause a dystonia reaction that consisted of severe muscle contractions that went throughout my whole body especially down my spine It was the absolute worst pain I have ever encountered in my life Eventually at the hospital they gave me an injection that reduced the process I feel like that I am going to do something crazy again because my life hasn't improved And I don't know how to have interesting conversations with people, so I don't even bother with introducing myself No one at college ever talks to me, I don't know why, but it seems like I am just not worthy of people s attention And I have spent years in college though I have only completed classes which has made me feel stupid slow and worthless It feels like college will never end and I will never get out of this hopeless situation I just don't know what to do I want to end it is feels like life is never going to change And I am pretty sure my folks will die by the time I finish college so then I will just kill myself instead of being homeless I am so goddamn lonely I just can't take it anymore FM
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Feels like I m at the end I've been struggling with severe depression for years now I've reached the point where I can't take it anymore and things in my life are bad enough to where I'm considering ending it I was supposed to be graduating from college next week I m I took a break from college to work This was supposed to be the time I finally finished college and started life on my own Then COVID happened my internship got cancelled and everything got pushed back On top of that my two internships are all I have to complete now and since I can't take them at the same time I'm losing my full-time status which means losing my Financial Aid All this work over the last couple of years just to get shut down at the end because of something completely out of my control There's other stuff to the severe anxiety and panic attacks I've been dealing with for years one of my only close friends straight up turned her back on me and stopped talking to me, I didn't take care of myself growing up and now have major tooth issues multiple broken teeth messed up teeth etc. I can't smile and If I ever want to date someone what girl wants a guy with messed up teeth I also don't have health insurance because college student so it's not like I can go get it fixed There's also a lot of deeper stuff that I'm not going to go into here because i m not here to write a novel I have Asperger s Syndrome Talking to people has always been an issue for me, I don't really have anything in terms of friends I feel so alone I love my family I don't want to hurt them but I don't know what to do any more Everything s just piled up, and I feel trapped with no way out Every day right now feels like it's just a struggle to survive I'm so tired of feeling this way every single day I have no energy left and I m done fighting
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French
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Je vais rentrer à la maison Nous allons tous rentrer à la maison Non-existence nous étions là pour l'éternité La vie est simplement une vacances dont je me lasse chaque jour Mais c'est ok la douleur cessera Chacun de nous nous y arriverons Nous rentrons tous à la maison Je t'aime
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French
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Je veux juste mettre fin à tout ce que je pense que j'ai eu assez de souffrance pendant des années, je ne sais pas quoi faire de ma vie, je suis mal traité par d'autres, j'ai toujours été appelé laid, j'ai ri de l'horreur, j'ai eu des regards sales, je suis devenu fou.
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French
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English
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In fifty days I will be dead Yes just like in days before my suicide
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English
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Pegged with possession in college and want to kill myself I'm a college student and yesterday I was reported to the police on the basis of the smell of marijuana I have never smoked in my room and I don't know who could have told on me, I was cited by campus police, and they reported me to the people on campus that deal with disciplining students Regardless of the fact this has just exacerbated my opinion on life and how it'll make everything harder and how my parents are going to be pissed off at me and how my brother is going to get blamed for everything even though he has no part in my now prior daily marijuana usage But they're the only reason I live for and I don't want to hurt them by my actions I wanted to be a doctor but I guess no more not with this on my file I won't be able to get federal student aid for next semester and probably won't get any more scholarship money I'll probably need to undergo probation pay a fine live with the people that reported me and can't look at in the eye due to shame and this shit s going to stick with me the rest of my life I just don't know what I'm going to do Reddit I feel like my parents will just be disappointed like they've been for a while and I don't want to disappoint them This entire thing has just been a steeper downward spiral I just came back from a counseling session and it s helped me but now that I'm just sitting here alone in my dorm I just keep feeling worse as time keeps going on I don't feel motivated to do work because what will it be worth in the end I just need something to keep my head occupied not dwell on this stupid action that might cost me my future
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I m not paying for you to go to the hospital again since you obviously don't care about yourself thanks mom not really my fault inpatient costs money but hey blame the demons in my brain
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English
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Is there a way to forget everything I want to forget who I am I want to erase all my memories and somehow erase this pain
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French
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Je sais que je dois faire face à la perte d'un jeu, mais je ne peux pas y faire face. En fait, je déteste absolument perdre un jeu. Tout au long de ces quelques années, j'ai joué à des jeux MOB comme League of Legends et SMITE.
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French
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Je ne sais pas quoi faire de plus Je ne veux plus vivre parce que je sais que je ne serai jamais vraiment heureux Les seuls moments de ma vie où j'ai ressenti des sentiments positifs sont quand j'ai été avec certaines filles Je tombe dans le bonheur trop dur et facilement et je sais que c'est un problème mais je ne peux pas aider tout le monde Je n'ai personne et je ne crois pas que je serai jamais capable d'aimer
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French
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Y at-il quelqu'un là-bas pour discuter avec Honnêtement, je n'aime pas poster alors avoir à attendre une réponse puis répondre, il est vraiment bénéfique pour moi si je pouvais discuter un à un avec quelqu'un S'il vous plaît je dois parler à quelqu'un Reddit
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English
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I'd like some advice What is the quickest and easiest way to kill your self I don't want help I'm past that, so please just answer the question I can't use a gun because I don't have access to them and jumping isn't an option either I want a painless way to die from the comfort of my home
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French
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L'émotion qui vient avec la vie quotidienne est trop perdu tellement j'ai tellement plus à perdre C'est censé être normal Je ne pense pas que je peux
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French
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Je veux que quelqu'un me dise de prendre ma vie est OK que j'ai été à travers les conneries La thérapie les médicaments parler à tout le monde sous le soleil Je ne veux pas de câlins sur Internet ou faux sentiment Je veux juste une personne pour me dire tout le bien qui pourrait venir de mourir ce soir Rassurez-vous que le monde continuera sans moi et qu'il n'y a pas de paradis ou l'enfer ou dieu pour me rencontrer que le repos dans le vide et rien de plus
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I can't keep going like this ve had suicidal ideation for almost years now I've never gone through with it though I just keep going along not changing anything surviving for another day I am excellent at talking a good game making plans etc., but I have no follow through On the one hand that means I am still alive but in the other hand that means nothing gets better and really things just get worse I am amazingly disconnected and detached from life I just don't care about anything I haven't been doing my job it has finally caught up to me and will likely be fired this week I don't exercise I don't sleep right I don't eat right I barely manage to keep myself distracted for enough for it to be time to go to bed again I avoid everything I can, I just want to die I just want it to stop Nothingness would be a gift But I can't do it I can't follow through Please God just kill me
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English
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Idkat this point I'm not trying to get better I'm thinking how and where I'm going to do it I'm not afraid of dead I'm afraid of keep living and keep messing things up I don't even know what do I want to hear here but here am I
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French
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Je me sens vraiment faible Salut donc j'ai fait un compte à rebours pour des raisons évidentes dunno si quelqu'un va lire ceci, mais je suppose que je ne vais pas aider à obtenir mes pensées vers le bas je me suis senti déprimé pendant quelques années à travers l'enfance et uni quand je l'ai gardé pour moi mais seulement ouvertement les dernières années Il y a des traumatismes que j'ai traités comme de l'enfance abuser et la violence
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English
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I'll be never good enough Not for them Not for her Not for myself No matter what I do I just seem to fuck it up I try to be caring and go out of my way to give what I have to those who matter most to me and it's just not enough They never call or text me asking to hang out or what's up she's always hanging out with the guy she knows I'm jealous of I just want someone fucking person that shows they actually care People laugh when I say I have no friends, and they say same like I was trying to be funny but to me, I'm being serious Nobody calls anybody texts anybody is just there I don't see a point in living like this any more It's just a constant back and forth battle that I blame myself for I haven't left my house for anything besides maybe getting food or stopping by the store in the past months at least My heart feels empty and I don't even feel sad any more it's just a feeling of drowning I just wish I could go missing or something
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English
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Thinking about suicide makes me so happy To think there's actually a solution and an end to all this suffering it's one of the few things that really makes me happy these days
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French
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J'ai planifié mon suicide Voici comment personne ne mérite mon attention Mais vous méritez une lame dans votre cou hmm Eh bien, je vais me tuer dans quelques jours Je vais laisser une note à tout le monde expliquant à quel point je les déteste Puis prendre un taxi pour un lac à proximité ou ainsi et me noyer
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English
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Help Please just calm me down EDIT Thanks everyone the help I got furious for no reason and I thought I was going to end it
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French
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French
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Dire à mes étudiants que je suis un professeur que j'ai formé en premiers soins en santé mentale, j'ai même vu un étudiant mourir de suicide, mais j'ai lutté avec ces pensées pendant presque des années, j'ai été hospitalisé deux fois, j'ai été sur SSRI, j'ai été sur la première hospitalisation, je suis devenu un conseiller, j'ai perdu ma vie, j'ai toujours envie de mourir.
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French
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J'ai besoin de quelqu'un pour parler, ils Les gens que j'ai fait grand à toutes sortes de choses sport scolaire travail que vous l'appelez et j'ai toujours été une personne gentille et attentionnée qui est toujours prêt à aider Mais ce que je n'ai jamais dit à personne était le fait que ma famille me méprise carrément peu importe ce que je fais Chaque fois que je reçois d'entendre ce genre de déception que je suis un fardeau financier ou pire encore qu'ils seraient mieux avec moi dans la tombe
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English
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Its getting worse and worse Worse and worse More and more I'm giving up This week I maybe left my bed for hour Only to get beer to get drunk by myself I don't see a future The only thing holding me back is I don't want to hurt my sisters and mother I love them so much, but I can't bring myself to show any love Nobody has ever told me they love me so how can I love others I can't push myself to live another year just to suffer Maybe I'll make this my last year I don't know, yet I just want someone to love me and to love them back
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English
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I m going to kill myself after Christmas m so fucking stressed right now it's getting so bad I was getting better but then the last months have been so shitty I was going to fix up my life in the next month while i m off on school holidays but now I realize that it's too hard that i m going to go back to school still haven't studied the last four topics in maths haven't practice languages in awhile and i m still ugly ASF I was going to eat better and exercise more to help clear my skin but now I realize that's none of this is going to happen i m going to go back to school the same fuck I really hope someone sees my post no one really replies to me on here
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French
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Services de protection de l'enfance m J'ai une anxiété sociale terrible un trouble de dépersonnalisation et je suis suicidaire je saute beaucoup l'école pas parce que je suis paresseux c'est parce que j'ai peur d'y aller j'aurais eu un travail pour les deux dernières semaines pour l'école mais je ne suis pas allé parce que j'étais prêt et honnêtement ce n'est pas un grand réconfort je pourrais travailler pendant deux semaines dans un mois
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English
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I really want to kill myself feel like killing myself is the only way I don't like myself I am ugly stupid and boring I really want to kill myself and I hope I succeed
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English
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I'm not scared of death any more It's comforting Dying is a big fear I've always had thinking about it would cause an immense amount fear It's not even actually dying it's thinking that I will never hear a song again never have my favorite foods never have sex again never kiss someone again never talk to my friends and go out never workout never ride my bike to a nice place That's it you re gone To this day that thought still kind of scares me but I'm not afraid to die I've lived enough I've had my first kiss fallen in love had sex been to many concerts made many great friendships done many fun things have so many great memories When I'm dead I'm not going to be there to care about that stuff I m gonna not going to be there to care about what I could have done I'm not going to be there to care about anyone who is sad about my death I m going to be gone unconscious and back to before I was born back to Nothing I am ready to die
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English
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People hate me I guess they'll never bother about me once I m gone would describe myself some kind of loser I'm currently I have always been bullied since I was young I still have no idea why a lot of people has been rude to me but that doesn't matter anymore When I was like years old I often got bullied by everyone teachers classmates everyone Now that I'm studying in a local institution I'd feel insecure, and I can tell that people who I don't even know would talk about me behind my back slander about me for things I don't even do attending classes some lecturers show their animosity and prejudice towards me Well of course sometimes I would just motivate and tell myself fuck whatever they said about me, I am getting immune to whatever shit people have said about me However I feel so tired of living in a world where I have done nothing wrong and assholes start to fuck my shit up for years I've thought that it would be better if I'd isolate myself away from such people, but I think it's best for me to end my life permanently I'm setting a date to die
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English
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I think it s because I'm a PhD students know that doctoral candidates and mental illness go hand in hand and I need to stand cautious against self-destructive behavior but this PhD is taking me to some dark places I'm recently married to a wonderful lady I have fantastic parents No debt Good health I am in good standing in my program and I have a job offer for when I graduate So why am I getting these thoughts Is it the hour workweek with no sign of reprieve Am I imaging all the other students hating me Why don't my advisers ever seem satisfied with my work Why do they treat me and my time like it is worthless I always feel rushed and consequently incapable and irresponsible Is this real or just an unreasonable environment Is this all be compounded by being many many thousands miles away from home No one knows it but I am struggling They all think I am making leaps and bounds in my work I am But I am falling fast The only reason I haven't off d myself is because of what how my family would take it is would not be not fair to them, I owe them more than that but if they were to disappear so would I tell myself this is only for a limited duration that it will all be OK once I graduate but could I be dealing myself some kind of long term mental harm by being in a program that is so bad that I consider ending my life just to escape it I want to go home but if I do that now I'll be seen a failure I m in no danger tonight but I operate one day at a time entrant Thank you
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French
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Est-ce que je deviens fou, je ne peux pas arrêter de penser au suicide, j'ai été de cette façon pendant au moins quatre ans, je me sens seul la plupart du temps, je veux mourir une autre grande partie, je l'ignore, mais les pensées suicidaires reviennent toujours, je ne marche pas tout le temps triste, mais les pensées sont là de toute façon, je suis devenu fou, et je ne sais pas
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